SPOILER ALERT!
If you haven’t seen the drama. Watch it first and appreciate this character better.
In my opinion as I’m binge watching the whole ‘My Demon’ Korean Drama series, I think the character with the saddest end would be Noh Do-gyeong.
Noh Do-gyeong is the only son to Kim Se-Ra and Noh Suk-min. Noh Suk-min is the eldest son of Ju Cheon-sook, chairwoman and matriarch of the Mirae Group. In the family, Noh Do-gyeong keeps quiet and is timid. He is not involved in any of the businesses of the family.
Why is he the saddest?
From what I’ve seen he exhibits Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) with anxiety, depression, and maybe Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) developed by years of abuse of all kinds by direct family since he was a child. And when the grandmother – Madam Ju died it feels like he also exhibited two grieving stages, guilt masked as anger and rage. He didn’t verbalize his motivations but the way his scenes where laid out and the way the actor portrayed this character, it screams a lot. The way he cried and laughed in varying levels of grief, resignation, confusion, disappointment, injustice and anger. I just can’t fathom the grief. He was brave and really tried his hardest to stay alive as long as he could to protect his mother. I am truly amazed by his self-preservation and he tried protecting his humanity the best he could. He had little screen time but his character has so much depth and possible back story. I am not justifying his actions. He didn’t really harm anyone until he was challenged by his own family to prove himself ONE LAST TIME. But if I was in his shoes, with that kind of abuse, I might’ve not existed for as long as he did. He made me remember this line, “This is how villains are made.” It is not that being a villain was the easiest choice but he was pushed by everyone to the brink. And the last straw was maybe when the person he was protecting said hurtful things that made him end it all.
It is sad because that one scene where he sincerely smiled at her mom for being silly of giving him an acne scar remover instead of a wound scar remover held so much hope and potential for the kind heart he never lost but was forced to hide.
Honestly, I relate to him so much. It must be that the emotions were familiar. He wasn’t a murderer, he tried to be, he almost did, but I felt that a part of him felt more relieved that no one died than the fear of disappointing his father.
And I wish for no one to feel this unnecessary grief. There are challenges that are necessary for people to grow but this kind of abuse, I’d like to think only happens in TV screens and no one is truly pushed to the edge by literally everyone. No siblings, no friends, no family, not even distant ones were around, all he had was himself. He stayed in the family when he could’ve ran away, he hoped until the very end and he tried protecting his mother that wasn’t brave enough yet.
If you are going through something, please take it from someone who’s been on the edge multiple times that it shall pass. If waking up is too hard, then sleep and ask would I like to get up now? Just keep asking and take small steps. Even before you know it you’ll be taking and making different choices.
the Asian Review 